Updates and personal thoughts

First I would like to warn my nonreligious friends that my thoughts today, have a religious theme. However, Christian, LDS, jewish or agnostic, (or atheist for that matter) I feel like what I have learned applies to all (you'll just have to look at it in a broader perspective).

 For those of you that do not know, for the past eight months (or basically most of my pregnancy) I have been pretty sick. For the first little bit I took a drug that helped, but it stopped working for me a long time ago. In the past it has been in waves, I have always thought it was growth spurts or something like that. Recently, however it has remained the only constant in the ups and down of my pregnancy.

   I want you to know I am NOT complaining, because I have accepted this, at first it was really hard for me, because I didn't really understand why I was sick all the time. I think that is the first thing that I am learning, acceptance. When we are faced with difficulties or trials in our lives, once we get to a point that we accept that things just are, it's so much easier to deal with. In fact I often find it funny; like today when I was on the phone to my sister back in Vegas, I know I was going to throw up but couldn't get off the phone fast enough. I have to laugh that I finally broke down and bought so Poise pads (if you don't know that those are then google it).

   The thing that amazes me is the fact that so many people are amazed by how small I am, and I keep thinking, " Look lady I would rather be fat and happy, then sick!" Anyways, that's just a personal pet peeve of mine.

   The most important lesson of all for me was of a spiritual or deeper lesson. I as all of you know am Mormon, LDS whatever you want to call it (but if you call us something mean I don't ever want to know that...) I believe in Jesus Christ, I believe that he is my Savior, that he suffered for my sins, and died for me. Today I felt like I came to a whole new understanding of my relationship to him. He suffered for all, and he suffered all. What I realized is, when we suffer it's not so that God understands our pain (cause he really already did), it's so that we can understand his. So that we can grow closer to him, and feel like in a small way we can relate. The funny thing is (at least in my case) that I suck at bearing my burdens, or cross. I don't want it most of the time, and complain about it the rest of the time.
  
   Honestly, it make me appreciate God more, and this whole human experience, in a short while I will be feeling more pain, and being a mother will bring more trials, but I think that this lesson will really help me more on a deeper level to over come anything that comes my way.

So little time...

Oh my, next week I will be 28 weeks pregnant, which in the world of pregnancy mean I will be in my third trimester. This is the last leg for me, so far Andrew and I have an apartment with two bedrooms instead of one and a half,  a few outfits and a bassinet. I am so overwhelmed at all the "things" I need. Mix in the fact that work has been over whelming me, and you have a very tired, stressed, woman that just doesn't want to do anything. So if anyone reads this, please give me any advice you can on what to do to prepare for what it to come in just a few short months...

Baby Countdown...

It's a girl!!!

This is our little peanut, it is so exciting to see her and know that she is a real person. What is I think the coolest however is the fact that I can feel her a lot more then I did before. It's overwhelming and exciting to know that we will be parents before too long. We are trying to find a bigger place and our goal is to eventually buy a home of our own. That is an adventure in and of itself. I am so excited to be a Mom.

2nd Trimester

So, I wanted to share one of the most exciting moments of my life. Today we heard the baby's heartbeat. I know that we saw it but that was more like looks at something alien or foreign. I felt like my baby was communicating to me for the first time. I am so excited. He/She is healthy and strong, and growing just the way that s/he should. Now that it has finally sunk in that I will be a mom, now comes the new concerns that I haven't allowed myself to ask because I was so scared. Questions like, what are we gonna do once the baby comes, then there are the practical functional questions like, how do I make sure that I am able to breast feed if I have to work too. Or, how do I select a pediatrician? We also need to get into a bigger place, and I want to have a nursery for the baby. How do I tell the people that I have been waiting to tell?
     I am excited for my Birthday February 22 because I am getting my official ultra-sound that day. What a great Birthday present, Happy Birthday to me. We will find out if the baby is a boy or girl then. Until then I want to know that everyone else thinks we will have. Boy or girl? Let me know! I am so excited, and you know what I am starting to feel better too!

Baby :-)

We had our first appointment today! We got to see the baby's heart beat. The nurse/midwife took a picture for us :-) The baby isn't much to look at quite yet, but it is healthy and growing, and most of all REAL!!! I think this was one of those wow moments for me that my life is about to change forever. I'm very excited and can't wait for ten more weeks, which just happens to fall on my Birthday. I will share all those pictures too! Thank you for you love and support and everything else!

3-Bean Chili

3-Bean Chili