It's a girl!!!

This is our little peanut, it is so exciting to see her and know that she is a real person. What is I think the coolest however is the fact that I can feel her a lot more then I did before. It's overwhelming and exciting to know that we will be parents before too long. We are trying to find a bigger place and our goal is to eventually buy a home of our own. That is an adventure in and of itself. I am so excited to be a Mom.

2nd Trimester

So, I wanted to share one of the most exciting moments of my life. Today we heard the baby's heartbeat. I know that we saw it but that was more like looks at something alien or foreign. I felt like my baby was communicating to me for the first time. I am so excited. He/She is healthy and strong, and growing just the way that s/he should. Now that it has finally sunk in that I will be a mom, now comes the new concerns that I haven't allowed myself to ask because I was so scared. Questions like, what are we gonna do once the baby comes, then there are the practical functional questions like, how do I make sure that I am able to breast feed if I have to work too. Or, how do I select a pediatrician? We also need to get into a bigger place, and I want to have a nursery for the baby. How do I tell the people that I have been waiting to tell?
     I am excited for my Birthday February 22 because I am getting my official ultra-sound that day. What a great Birthday present, Happy Birthday to me. We will find out if the baby is a boy or girl then. Until then I want to know that everyone else thinks we will have. Boy or girl? Let me know! I am so excited, and you know what I am starting to feel better too!

Baby :-)

We had our first appointment today! We got to see the baby's heart beat. The nurse/midwife took a picture for us :-) The baby isn't much to look at quite yet, but it is healthy and growing, and most of all REAL!!! I think this was one of those wow moments for me that my life is about to change forever. I'm very excited and can't wait for ten more weeks, which just happens to fall on my Birthday. I will share all those pictures too! Thank you for you love and support and everything else!

3-Bean Chili

3-Bean Chili

I got a JoB! Finally!

So, I have been trying to find a job that will include my educational background as well as my personal strengths. It has been a battle for me. But, today I was hired for a job that I feel will be just that. It a rehabilitation for teenage girls with behavior issues. It not drug rehab, but more a last chance before jail. I am excited because these are girls that want to change their lives. I have been trying to get a job like this forever. This will help me see what it like in Social Work, and help me see if this is really what I want to do when I go to grad school. Any ways I'm really happy that thing are working out.

When times are tough

So I have been looking for a job for the past month, and it has been a lot harder then I am used to. It rattles me to the core and there is HUGE part of me that would quit looking. But I need to keep perspective, and just like everything else stay positive. I know that everything will work out, I am not the kind of person that just sits on the side-lines either. So there have been some ups and some downs, and I think that it would be good and more honest to list both. So I think I want to end on the high note.
I think the hardest part of not having a job is when I get my hopes up and think that I will get a job and then I am let down. The feeling is similar to going on a date feeling that there is something there, maybe even kissing the guy and feeling good about everything. Only to end the date and a week later wonder what happened?! It hurts, and takes some soul searching to realize that yes, I am not perfect, but neither is anyone else. I bruises the pride, and in the case of employment I think it is far worse because our livelihood depends on working.
That attitude is wrong though. We call all improve our resume, and how we look, and it's not like I have never applied for a job and not gotten it before. The difference now is that I want it so much more. So, to flip the coin and see the good things about being unemployed. First and most important I can spend time with my Andrew. I love him, and our relationship has grown extensively. Especially, because when we were first married I was working fifty plus hours a day. Now he's working, and I am not.
I have had more time to serve others. That is a great one because I love serving more then anything else! I feel like I am growing as a person, and I am owning the life that I live ( and that is important) because everything in my life has been a choice. In the end what I know is that I love my family, and know that is what is most important, and thing will all work out.

Rough Spots

So Andy and I have a nice new little apartment, that we love. Things for the most part are going well. I find that I am having somewhat of a difficult time adjusting to my new life. Some times I fell ragging mad that I am no longer in school, and am not pursuing some distant crazy dream. Then realizing that marriage is that dream, that great challenge and adventure I wanted my whole life. IT'S HARD!
Mostly it is teaching me to be a better person, and learn to communicate. I love my life and my husband very much, that is probably what make the learning so difficult. Love, is easy but life is complicated. I know that I have a lot to learn and a lot more love to give. That means that many more opportunity to polish out the rough spots.